Pen out of ink

sunny and minus a bazillion (approx)

So cold there was ice fog on the way in to Cowansville this morning. It was actually minus 25. Not quite as cold as last monday when it got down below minus 30.

We're having one of those days where nothing is easy. No big problem, but things that should be easy just aren't. And it becomes cumulative. A headlight is out in the beetle. Small thing. So off we went to Cowansville to have it fixed and the mechanic (who was doing us a huge favour fitting us in) could get one headlight out, but not the one that actually needed replacing.

So we have to head an hour away to the dealership in Sherbrooke Thursday at 7:15am to get it fixed before we leave.

Really, the things are so miniscule they're hardly worth mentioning, but they become simply tiny irritants. Like being out of milk. Or using the last piece of paper towel. Picking up a pen and its out of ink. The blackberry suddenly won't receive messages. One of the speakers in the stereo keeps blanking out. The woodbox needs refilling.

Funny, I was just talking to Teresa, my agent in London and she's having exactly the same day. Things that could take one step suddenly take three. Everything's empty at once. Everything breaks at once.

We agreed when that happens the important thing is to take a step back, take a deep breath and get a grip. I find in my life I can generally handle the big things well - but give me a mountain of tiny irritants and I'm liable to go over the deep end. And take as many people with me as I can!

Oddly, writing it down helps. Gives me perspective.

Now you know my dirty little secret. The blog is my therapy. My personal diary. My comfort on cold days.

Thanks for listening - please don't bill me. Besides, the pen's out of ink and I can't find the cheque book. And don't even get me started on stamps.

Hope your day's going smoothly!

Bathing suit - emergency

light but constant snow, mild, temps minus 4

Lovely dat - large, fluffy flakes. We met Cheryl for breakfast in Sutton this morning. Michael comes in with me, but is banished to the coffee shop area for breakfast with his book or newspaper while Cheryl and I get to sit in the dining room. And get all caught up. How wonderful to have a bosom pal, who seems to always be going through the same angsts, the same challenges and questions and wonderments as I am. We try to figure out why, and what to do about it. We also laugh so hard, and tell each other all the great things happening in our lives. You know, the stuff that sounds like bragging and we're taught not to mention. Well, Cheryl and I tell each other all the unmentionables. Good and bad. And eat eggs and bacon and sip coffee while doing it. And I always come away refreshed and energized.

Michael and I just realized that our loaner car is not insured for trips into the States. this would not normally be a problem, except that we're going to St. Lucia a week tomorrow and will be flying from Burlington, VT. We need to get there. With our luggage.

We can't take the large loaner car - and our other car, as you might know, is a VW Beetle.

So when we got back from breakfast we brought the summer clothes and the suitcases up from the basement. And then tried to stuff the big suitcases into the small beetle, as a test run. Shoving, and pushing and cursing.

Much like what is about to happen when I finish this and go upstair to try to shove my Buick body into a VW beetle bathing suit.

Damn those sneaky pastries. And the bacon. And the eccles cakes. And the medicinal pizzas. etc.

The only way I'm going to get the bathing suit onto my body will be to eat it. Thank God we've rented a private villa so I needn't worry about scaring small children on the beach. Or having someone alert Greenpeace.

We finally did get the luggage in - and then began the struggle to get it back out. We might have to airmail the entire beetle.

Oh well - I have to say, I enjoyed each and every bite - and if this is the consequence, then so be it. I'm fortunate to be married to a man who doesn't seem to care. As long as we're healthy. I think he long since gave up the hope I'd be a trophy wife. Though I suppose it depends what the competition was for.

OK - off upstairs to see how bad it is. God bless spandex.

East Coast snow!

light snow, mild, temps minus 3

A beautiful, gentle day here...in contrast to what those of you along the east coast have last night and today. My God - 18 inches in places. Some places more. New York city getting a foot and a half. It must have been absolute chaos.

Our day was very quiet. I went off to be Pina-ed. She's our neighbour and runs an exercise class in Sutton which Michael and I have started taking again. After a 5 year hiatus. Have you noticed that some days, when exercising, it's not terribly difficult and other days you can barely lift your legs? I had the latter today. Torture. Pinatized. I might need therapy. Again.

But wow, does it feel good when you stop.

Popped into the grocery store (resisted the chips and gummis) then home just in time to meet Kirk. He and Jane are helping us design the renovation. We have a solarium at the end of our kitchen which was never the best quality and has not improved with age. So now it's like having an open window in our kitchen. And when it's minus 34 as it was Monday, that is not a good thing.

So we've decided to re-do it, and the kitchen. So Kirk came by to discuss it, and then our contractor came and we all walked around discussing options.

Now, I'm not extravagant. Mostly because I hate being in debt. If we can't pay it off quickly, it doesn't happen. So the poor contractor kept having to re-adjust the ideas to try to fit our budget. But my theory is that anyone can do a great house if you have a million dollars. The creativity comes in trying to achieve something beautiful and useful on a modest budget.

that's what we're trying to achieve. We'll see how I feel when the cardboard kitchen cabinets arrive, and the sod floor.

then in the afternoon we got caught up on bits and pieces - wrote the February newsletter for instance - and replied to emails.

Hope those of you along the east coast are safe and have managed to dig out. We're thinking of you.

Snow-mo

gorgeous day - mild, light snow - perfect winter day. temps minus 2

What a change from Monday! It's like we suddenly walked into a different (heated) room. the cold snap ended and now it's unseasonably mild. But wonderful. Just cold enough to keep the snow.

Did a big french interview yesterday morning. On Radio Canada...their flagship radio show - goes nationally. With Christiane Charette. When my Quebec publisher told me about the interview I almost wept. And not tears of joy. I knew I couldn't turn it down - way too big, and way too important - and I had to support the released of the second book in french, Sous la glace. But I find it hard enough to find the words to describe what I'm doing in english....trying in a second language is torture. and I sure didn't want to either become so frightened my brain froze, or manage to speak, but sound like a slow three year old. And do a disservice to the books.

Ugh.

So I agreed to the interview, and it felt like falling slowly off a cliff, as the day approached. I read over and over an interview I'd given in la Presse with Nathalie Petrowski. she and I met last week for coffee and we talked. In english. Then she translated what I said into french.

I went over and over that interview - making note of key words. Then I called in the Big Gun. My friend Susan, who helped prep me for french interviews last year when the first book came out. susan agreed to meet me at Radio Canada for breakfast yesterday, and go over some french answers to possible questions....and just get my mind in gear. How wonderful, and patient, Susan was.

finally it was time. It feels like every nightmare I ever have. Showing up for an exam and realizing i haven't been to class all year, and certainly haven't studied. Or finding myself on stage in front of hundreds of people in a play - but I haven't learned my lines.

And then - I'm suddenly naked.

At the very least, as I walked toward the studio, I knew I might make a balls-up of it, but I probably wouldn't suddenly find myself naked.

Happily, another friend, Anne Lagace Dowson, was also a guest - invited by the brilliant producers when they realized I might not be up to a 20 minute live national radio interview. So the red light went on and Christiane introduced us...and then the three of us talked. In french. The whole time. Well - I resorted to english for a few words or phrases, but Anne translated and we went on. And not once did I feel my clothes slipping off.

I'll tell you, there's no relief like feeling that ten ton stone being released! Phew. What joy when it was over - and realizing I hadn't made a mess of it. Wow. I'm SO grateful to Susan and Anne - to Christiane for her patience. What a relief.

Then drove back home - it was snowing and I had the little car, so I took the back roads.

Arrived home exhausted, and make a tea and went to bed. At 5pm.

Today we had a breakfast meeting in Knowlton with Lise. What fun, to discuss the books and contracts and permissions and mailing with Lise over a warm muffin and cafe au lait.

then off to Granby for lunch with our friend Louise. Then she had us back to her home for tea and homemade banana bread. Absolutely yummy!!! We did a little sort of ritual - sitting in a circle with a candle....and sent away any pain and darkness from Jacques' days of illness in the home. And invited in the light. And healing. Contentment and peace.

It was very beautiful. And we could all feel Jacques' presence. The cat did something he's never done before too, as we sat in the circle. He curled up in Louise's lap.

The photo above we took in Granby when we arrived for lunch. It looked so singular - and we loved their snow hair and snow necklaces.

How unexpected life is.

A friend wrote today and ended her letter by saying she hoped we were in 'dangerous good health'. I thought that was such a fun way of putting it. I hope the same for you!

Three Dog Night

Oh my God - it's noon and minus 21 degrees. At 8 this morning it was minus 29. Apparently at about 6am it was -32.

A three dog on the bed night. We only have one, so Trudy was working overtime to keep us warm. The kitchen, with the leaking solarium, is like a fridge. Happily the living room is toasty warm. But I'll tell you, when it gets this cold everything is fragile. Everything creaks.

Trudy went out this morning - as briefly as possible - and came back limping from the cold. It's so cold it burns her pads. And our lungs. Easy to start coughing on a morning like this. And there's ice frost - so cold the air starts to freeze. Very beautiful, actually.

I remember when I lived in Winnipeg it would get so cold the car tires froze square to the ground and the car seats felt like concrete. Michael and I were pretty sure the little bug wouldn't start this morning. Tony was standing by the boost it from his truck if necessary - but it started.

There were wind chill warnings out - and black ice warnings along the highway. The irony of a northern winter - it is achingly beautiful - and deadly.

We went off to Cowansville for breakfast then the garage to get the replacement car until Michael's 'real' car is fixed.

Thank you for all your well-wishes, and your own stories. They really do help. We're feeling actually just fine. - a few bruises, but surprisingly neither of us is afraid to drive. But we are afraid to be very far from each other. I think that's the only side-effect to the accident. I had to drive back in to Montreal today to do a live Radio Canada interview in french tomorrow morning - Michael is staying at home with Trudy. But we needed to connect with each other as soon as we both arrived at our destinations. And a few times since. Don't like being more than 10 feet apart. Practically texting him when he's in the next room.

Not sure how long this will last - probably until the divorce.

Nice to be safe and sound and warm inside. Hope you are too.

Had fabulous news today - BURY YOUR DEAD has been nominated for the Dilys Award in the US! This is chosen by the Independent Mystery Bookseller's association, and represents the books they most enjoyed selling in 2010. The other nominees are: Steve Hamilton (The Lock Artist), Dennis Lehane (Moonlight Mile), Colin Cotterill (Love Songs From a Shallow Grave), Keith Thomson (Once a Spy), and Don Winslow (Savages).

Congratulations to everyone.

The award will be given out at the crime readers/writers convention called Left Coast Crime in February.

Oooops

light snow, temps minus 9

I know the east coast is getting walloped again! But the brunt is missing us. How strange that New York would be having a tougher winter than Quebec. We're practically the banana belt this year. Hope those of you in the storm area are safe and sound.

We had an event driving in to Montreal yesterday. A car accident. The first I can remember being in since I was a child. And it was totally my fault. We were driving just outside Cowansville and needed gas, so I went to turn left into the gas station and was concentrating on which pump to go to - and not watching the oncoming cars! Seems that's a mistake.

I think I heard a horn screaming and looked up in time to see the bright red (bright red!!! not even gray or white or anything I could pretend was invisible) car bearing down on us. A split second later it hit, right in the passenger's door - where Michael was sitting - and we were shoved over the road. I immediately turned to Michael to make sure he was OK. he said he was. Then I leapt out of the car to make sure the people in the other car were OK. The entire front end of their car was smashed in. But they seemed OK. The young woman was out of the car and was crying. I immediately told them it was completely my fault. This didn't seem news to them. I went to comfort her, but she, quite understandably, waved me off. He was calling the police. The dog in their car was fine.

I went back to Michael and he complained of pain in his side, so we got him out of the car, got his coat on, and took him in to the gas station. Everyone was wonderful. The young couple had calmed down, once they realized everyone was fine - and we commiserated. He'd been in an accident a few years earlier and understood that accidents happen. How kind is that? To comfort me. I was, of course, very upset. Not hysterical - but I wanted to make sure they understood that I took full responsibility - and wanted to make sure they really were OK.

Once out of the car and seated comfortably in the gas station, Michael could take stock and said he was actually OK. Perhaps a little bruised.

The Surete du Quebec arrived along with two tow trucks and everything moved very quickly. The Surete agent was amazing. Very kind, understanding, efficient. She heard our reports of the accident - took notes - reassured me that while it was my fault it clearly was an accident and worse things had happened. And no one was hurt.

When the cars had gone and Pat was about to show up to take us home, I went to thank the Surete agent and she laughed and said that it was her pleasure and that her daughter had won the scholarship in creative writing Michael and I created at the local high school when I signed my first publishing contract. And that she was now studying writing at college. She thanked me for that.

How strange life is.

We went home, thanks to Pat, called the insurance etc. Freshened up, then climbed in car number 2 to continue our trip to Montreal. But decided to stop at the hospital to have Michael checked out. Better be safe. After about 3 hours, and a few scans, they said he was in top shape. Just bruised.

Poor man. I think he's tired of hearing me apologize. And what a brave man, getting back in the car with me driving - and our beetle at that! And with only a few whispered prayers. he said if I'd wanted to kill him I'd done a pretty poor job of it, though he admitted it might have been just a warning. A shot across the bow.

When we got to montreal I ordered two medicinal pizzas and got him a big bar of chocolate. It seems to have worked. He's feeling much better today. I called the two young people from the other car to see if they were OK too - or if some bumps and bruises came up. No answer, but left messages. But spoke to their insurance people today and she said they were just fine.

What a relief!! I don't know if you've ever been in a car accident, but the thought I'd caused it and that anyone might be hurt was horrible. Especially, frankly, hurting Michael.

Though now, of course, he has a big, fat IOU from me. And I can see him scheming how to use it.

I'll tell you too - within the scope of this being a not good event - we were exceptionally lucky. Had I turned into the path of that bus you can see in the photo, or an oncoming truck this would have been a much, much shorter post. And had we not had a fabulous, solid car, well I tremble to think what might have happened in a less robust vehicle.

Normally after something like that we would have stayed in Sutton but I had to get in to Montreal for the launch of Sous la glace at Indigo books today. There's a photo of the poster in the window of Indigo in Montreal. It went very well. And I had a chance to meet Rob Howard - who flew in from Toronto so we could sit down for a couple of hours and talk about the next book. He's the VP of Fenn, which will publish my next few books in Canada. Terrific man - very interesting discussions.

Michael - lucky one - got a bye and stayed home eating chocolate and playing sudoku. And now I must leave you to pamper him some more. He never once, from the moment that car hit to this chastised me. No recriminations, no anger, not even any annoyance. he's just said over and over that accidents happen and not to worry about it. Even as the tow truck took his beautiful car away.

What a lovely and precious man.

tomorrow is his son Vic's birthday - which is a great reason to celebrate. Among many.

Edgar nominations

light snow, mild, gentle winter day temps, minus 3

The Mystery Writers of America announced their Edgar nominations today. I have to admit, I dared harbor a hope that BURY YOUR DEAD would be on the list. But it wasn't.

This doesn't in any way mean I'm upset about the books and authors who are nominated. Just the opposite. I'm very happy for them because I know how they must be feeling. How thrilled they must be.

Congratulations to the Best Novel nominees-

Harlan Coben - Caught
Tom Franklin - Crooked Letter, Crooked Letter
Tana French - Faithful Place
Timothy Hallinan - The Queen of Patpong
Steve Hamilton - The Lock Artist
Laura Lippman - I'd Know You Anywhere